Okay, so you’ve manifested the perfect life: the beautiful car, the thrilling relationship, the successful business, the perfect spiritual experiences of infinite and unending bliss – everything has come to fruition! You got rich, you are in perfect physical health, you conquered the world, you reached pure, unexcelled enlightenment! Wonderful!
But, of course, it will all be empty and meaningless if you don’t know who you really are beyond manifestation and time.
And then there’s the shadow side of manifestation; the fears, the doubts, the anxiety rumbling underneath the entire project: Everything I have I can lose, everything external can be taken away. Others can do better than me. The manifestations can disappear. Even states of pure spiritual bliss are drenched in impermanence. And the growing realisation: However much I have, it’ll never be enough. The more I accumulate, the more dissatisfied I can grow. When will I reach a point of total contentment? When will the seeking end? When will I be able to rest deeply? When will I feel fully alive? When will I be Home?
It’s natural that the Law of Attraction will eventually lead you not to the perfect contentment, but to the perfect disillusionment. This is not a mistake, or a failure of the Law (for the Law cannot fail on its own terms), but the beginning of real spiritual maturity. All illusions must die, even our most cherished ones. And the biggest illusion of all? The ‘me’ itself.
Who is the one doing the manifesting? What is the ‘me’ who manifests or does not manifest? WHO AM I? This question goes to the very root. And life will bring you to this question one way or another.
You lose your money, your success, your popularity, your fame, your looks. You are diagnosed with an illness. Someone you love leaves you. Suffering appears out of the blue. Did you manifest the ‘negative’ with your ‘negative’ attitude? Is it all your fault? Did you fail in your manifestation project? Is the ‘me’ not what it should be? Is it all a big mistake? Has the universe gone wrong? Is that possible?
If you believe that it’s you – personally – who’s doing the manifesting, if you think that you are the one in control, then the pressure to manifest ‘properly’ will eventually begin to suffocate your joy. And there will be inner violence – self-blame, guilt, feelings of lack and spiritual failure – when the manifestations aren’t what you wanted or planned for. You’ll beat yourself up for not living up to the Law. And you’ll strive even harder, working yourself to the bone, exhausting yourself. For what? For whom?
Relax, friend. It was never ‘you’ who was manifesting in the first place. The separate ego, the ‘me in charge’ is, and was, and always will be, the greatest illusion of all. The ego’s dream of perfection must collapse into outrageous humility, and absolute gratitude for what is here, for what is given, however much that clashes with the ego’s plans. Life was never really yours to begin with. The good, the bad, and the ugly, are all inexplicable gifts.
This is terribly depressing news for the ‘me’, but pure liberation for who you truly are.
Unconditional Love is higher than any Law. The wave cannot manifest the ocean, nor can any wave control the ocean, although it may believe in control for a while. Understand this and you are always at peace, whether things go well or don’t go well, whether your life story seems good or bad, positive or negative, whether or not your manifestations are wonderful ones, whether they love you or they crucify you and everything you stand for. As a seemingly perfect wave or a gloriously imperfect one, even in the midst of your flaws and weirdnesses and apparent failures, you are always a perfect movement of the Unnameable non-dual ocean of Consciousness. You are Life Itself, and therein lies your completion and your unbreakable joy; and your true contentment.
So yes, dream, manifest, create an incredible life for yourself, if that’s what wants to move through you! Play, play, play! And know that there is no pressure for you to succeed at all. Know that even in your failure, even in your despair, even when your dreams turn to dust, even when your beautiful manifestations crumble to the ground, even when you are full of doubts, everything is thrillingly okay even when it’s not okay, and there is no divine plan that has been broken, and you are loved beyond measure, beyond time itself. There is simply no pressure for you to hold up any image of yourself, and there never was. You are always off the hook.
There is a Light that never goes out, and it was always You.